Imma Wiserd Commentary
by KeKe5379
Summary: Here it is! A another Imma Wiserd commentary!
1. Chapter 1

AN: afta redin da hairy potty books (not rly i saw the mooviez lolololol) i desided 2 make mi own hary potty storee. Oh Lord

note 2 da reedars: neva beliv any1 hu sayz a blak man dont like fired chickin. Wait..What?

I wuz sittin out on da porch an mi mama leend out da windo an sayed "watchu doin soulja spirit buu jackson?".**Nice Name**

"nuttin much" i said "we gut no food".**You gut no food? **

"o turtle don cri"** This has more spelling mistakes then My Immortal. **

"na mama i aint mad" i says. den i loked at da gund n said "i wish i had sum fried chinkin" den... dere wuz fried chikin on da grion!11111111111111 **Whats with the one's?**

"yo buu wuz dat i smel" mi mama said. I lookd arund all snecky **( Shouldn't you show her so she doesn't starve to death?) **like and den i whispad "fried chikin" an it went away. i wuz scared but nut in a afrayed way. den i whispad again "fried chicken" and it appered agan!111 so den i desided 2 tri sumden out. "wattamelon" an dere it iz a big ol slice o watrmellon at mah fet.**( Spell check just broke )** mah mam lend out da door agan "boi now i no i smel sumden". so den i leaned ova and wispad "fired chikin... wattamelon" an dey boat went away.**( Wait, is this why he goes to Hogwarts? )** i gut up an says 2 mi mama "lock mama!11 i aint gut nottin!11"

"but im so hundreh"**( Hundred?)** sayed ma mama. den i felt sad. so i pointed mah finger at da grund an sayed "fried chikin" den a big ol bunmch of fired chikim appeerd. mi mama jumpt an scrammd. she ran in da house an slamed da door. "dun cum bak or ill shot ya!" she sayd. so i left. **( DO IT )**

so whadda think? IF U FLAM UR RASSIST. **( Good Lord. )**


	2. Chapter 2

**I forgot to mention. I do not own Imma Wiserd cause if I did, I would kill myself. Now on with the story! Has anyone lost their brain cells yet? Just wondering. **

AN: im jus ritin dis now becuz i gut a butload o insparashun ** From who?**

den i went 2 hagwats. **( Hagwarts? ) **dena nigga came out a no were an says "hey im harry potter".**( HARRY POTTER IS WHITE! )** i turned an said "u aint harry potter!11 i saw him in da movis!"

"i no but fo da audeance dey got a wite boi 2 play mi" **Why would they do that?**

"wat i said. **You heard him.**

"u herd mi" **Umm.**

"dem rassist ppl!"

i entred da big ol place were everabodi eatz **( The Great Hall? ) **an dey put da wiserd hat on mi hed and it says "yo in ravenclaw" *** Busts out laughing.* My Immortal anyone? **

"hey daz were i stay" sed harry potter.**( NO IT IS NOT! )** den we both went to da room togedder. wen we were dere we saw the dumbldoor.**( Is that some kind of door? )** an he turnt 2 mi an sez "welcum 2 skool distrect 7 (wateva dat meens). im ur dumbledoor." **( Of course he is THE Dumbledoor ) **

hairy turnd t mi an seys "dis is da dumbledoor of da entire skool." **( I WANT A DUMBLEDOOR AT MY SCHOOL! )**

"hi mistr duumbledoor"

"yo can call mi alvin".

**( It's ABLUS. He is NOT a chipmuck. )**

"ok alvin"

"goodbi" he sed an raned out on hiz broomstik. **( How can you run on a broomstick?) **

"im sleepi" sed hairy potter

"butt its not even 12 o clock yet" i sed **( Cause nobody sleeps before 12:00 p.m. ) **

"i no but tomorow we hav skool an ill sho u all de pretti girlz an how to play bromstiks" **( You mean Qudditch? ) **

"sho" i sed "do u lik 50 cent?"

"do u lik soulja boi?" sed harry

we were best frends. *** Bangs head on desk***


	3. Chapter 3

**AN: Congrats. You get two chapters EVERY DAY! I'll try anyway. But it's not like I have any readers. **

AN: im jus crankin dem out!1 if dis keepz up i jus mite publish it! **And people will be running for the last copy. *Rolls eyes***

da next day me an hary went doun 2 da big kitchin where all da chillin were chillin :) **The chillin were chillin? That sounds fun!**

i sat down at a tabel nex 2 a pak o crackers whu sayd "boi u cnat sit here!" **A pack of crackers? Wha-?**

"y" i sed ** Cause its way too hard to spell out "why"**

"u haf 2 sit at da bak of da kitchin!"

den hairy came down an sayed "dun mind him. dat tabel is fo da snake ppl.**(Does that mean there real snakes?)** ur a ravencaw! u hav 2 sit at da ravenclaw tabel!" so we sat at da ravinclaw tabel. "dun mind dat cracker. daz rassist." **Cause everyone is "rassist" in Turtles world! **

"ok" i sed

"des r mi frinds" dere wuz a pretty gurl named herman.**( You did not just call Hermione Hermin)** she fell in love wit me. it wuz so grat.**(How do you know Hermione is in love with you?)** we had brekfast togedder. den we went 2 skool. **(You were already AT school) **furst we had magik class.**( This story just drags you in doesn't it?) ** the teecher wuz an old womin wit glases and an ol droopy suit. "letme see wut u can do" she said. i pointed at da ground. "fried chikin" i sed. sum fried chikin apered on da flor. she piked it up an took a bit. "yum yum" she sayed and eatted it all. "i no wut class u should go in. u shud go in da blak magic clas." **(Oh Gosh. )**

"wut" i sed.

"dun worri, im nut rassist" she sad. "sum children r good at blak magik whil odders r wite magik." **( Where does he get these amazing ideas?) **

"well ok" i sed

she gave us lots o homwork.

we had mor classes.**( I had NO idea )** den hary tok me outsid. "heres a bromstik" he said. and he gave me a bromstik. "wats dis 4?" i sed. "4 bromstiks fool!" harry sed.**( Am I the only who laughed at that? )** "dunt get hurt turtle" sed herman.

"now dis is wut u hav 2 catch" sed hary and he took out a ball wit wings. it flu in2 da ski.

but u hav 2 dog dis cuz it will try an hit u" he took out a big blak ball that hit me in mi hed. "ow i sed" **( Shouldn't you be on the ground, in pain?) **

"sorry" sed hary. he took out his wand an sed "go away" and the big blak ball flu into da sky.

den he tok da biggist ball of dem all. it looked lik a soccer ball. "u have to pass dis so it goes into da hols." **(I just realized how wrong Quidditch sounds. I mean holes into balls?)**he throgh it at me an i caut it. "UR AMAZING" sed harry potter. so we flew up in da sky an began 2 play. mi ballz startd 2 hurt. "**(Uh.) **my balls hert!" i sed. "sit on it lik dis" sed harry potter. an i did. meanwhile we playd an alot o ppl came arond an watcht ud. dere wuz so many of dem dat dey filed up all da seets. dey wa cherin. den i saw da flin bal. i didnt wan t harry to see it so i sed "imma gonna go up here fo a whil"** (I think I just broke my brain) **

"wel alrit as log as u dont cach da snickers!" **( I want some Snickers. All I have is these stupid fruit snacks ) **

"ok" i sed lik i didn se it.

"wel ok" sed harry potter "bcuz im aboot to put da ball in ur hole!" **( Ughh. Bad Images. )**

i went up but wen i wuz abutt to get it a guy in a big blak cap came in on his brommsticks. He poented his wond at me "die". i den fel off mah bromstik. "AHHHHHHHHH!111111111" i sed. **( YAY! )**

"TURTLE!11111" sed herman. da ppl scremd when i wuz fallin. it hit da grund. then i died. **(Is it done? No, because there's 73 more chapters! )**


	4. Chapter 4

**AN: I do not own Imma Wiserd. There happy? **

An: heres anodder chapper!** NOO! **

da next day i wook up in da hosbitel. "ur all betta" sed da nurse. **Wasn't he died in the last chapter?**

"nigga don scar me lik dat" sed herman. **Hermione would NEVER say the N word. **

"u almost dyd" sed harry pottr. **He did die!**

"wut was dat?" i sed.

"it wuz da dark lord vadermort and he wantz to hurt ur mama" **Whitch brings me back to the first chapter. Why was she freaking out about the fried chicken? **

"WART?11" i sed **Wart? WHERE!**

"u gotta lisin turtle u gotta kill vadermort. it sed so in da profasi" **What. Is. A. Profasi? **

"dat sounds dangerus" sed herman

"yeah he wants 2 destroi da world" sed harry **More like take over the world**

"ok" i sed "if he touchs ma mama IMMA POP A CAP IN DAT NIGGAS ASS!11111" **So, he says if you flame your "rassit" but he keeps on saying the N word?**

den da dubledoor cam in. "shuddnt u chilldrn b in class?" he sed **YES! Finally some common sense! **

"but da dark lard almst killd turtel!11" sed herman **Yeah, almost. *sighs* **

"dun say dat name" sed da vadermort **(Where did he come from?)** "especially u turtle"

"well ill hafta suspind u all" sed dumbeldoor "especially u turtle" den da dumbldor runnd awy on his bromstik. so we all went bak to our rooms. **Because no one goes to class anymore.**

i went to sleep. when i wuz alssep i saw da man wit da blak cape and da blak coat.**(Cape? Coat? What kind of dream is this?)** dere was a snake coimg out of da front a himself.**(You really need to get that checked.)** he wuz sittin in a char in fron of da fried place.**(KFC?)** he sed 2 da snape "imma kill dat nigga boi soulja spirit buu jackson" **And then I woke to Jason and died. THE END **I woke up scard. dere wuz som1 under da cofers wit me. it wuz herman. she wuz nekked. **I can sense a really bad sex scene **"lets hav sex" she said. so she bends over and i stuk my big blak cok in her tinee wite ass. **Wait, aren't they in their FIRST YEAR?**

"YES TURTLE YES" she sed. den i cam. an we stop. "what r u doin" sed harry next to me.** Busted** "noddin" i sed ambarrist. "oh. i tot i herd somting." **Harry, you're not THAT stupid.**

"i didnt heer noddin" i sed.

"oh, okay" sed harry and he went bak to slep. den we all went doon 2 brekfest. **So Harry went back to sleep, but it was already morning? WAKE UP HARRY!** "how did u slep?" sed herman. "gret" i sed an slimed. **Is that like some weird new dance? **

"what're u guys takken bout" sed harry pottr.

"aww noddin" i sed an i smield. **At least he didn't slime.**

"yeh" sed herman an she smiled.

"yeh" i sed an i slmied 2. **Your face must hurt from all that smiling. **

"what r u boiz smilin bout?" sed da dumbeldoor.

"ah noddin" **Why does he keep on nodding?**

"well u had bettr hury up an get 2 clss" sed da dubledoor.

"ok we sed an den we went 2 magik class **Which one?**

"did u all do ur homerk?" sed da teakher?

"i didnt" i sed.

"why not, turtle! u hav such potenshal!" she sedc *** Snorts * **

"bcuz he was almost kiled bi vadermort" we sed.

"u fot vadermort? u must b a grat wizrd!" she sed. "fin u get an a+" she sed. **Harry Potter be doing better then Hermione if that happened to him.**

we sat thro class.

AN: haha u thot i wuz ded didnt u! **Not thought. Hoped. **well i trikd u lololol mor chpters cummin soon **Ughh, this is going to be a long commentary.**


	5. Chapter 5

**AN: I DO NOT OWN Imm Wiserd. All credit goes to ravenretallishun. Blame him.**

**AN**: tanks 4 all da gud reveuz !**Who would give him good reviews?** recntly i watched da hary pottr moovies again so i cud get ma fadcts strat. **I hope.**

"helo everabodi mah nam is magik jonson" sed magik jonson. ***Slams head on desk***

"water u doin techin dis class" i sed

"im ur techer" sed magik jonson "dey duont call mi magik 4 noddin!1 wen i quit bascetball i bcam a techer at hogwats" i loked arond da room. dere wuz alot o niggas in dis class. an... DRACO!111 but he sat at da bak o da classrom. **I hope this guy doesn't screw up my favorite character. **

"class 2day we will lurn how 2 sumon patronises"

"wuz a patronis" i sed** Something you'll never do.**

"ull see" sed magik jonson.

so we went in2 da midle off da room

"normaly wen pracisin wit partorises we normally use dememtors...**That is really dangerous.. not that Im complaining. **but seeing as how dis is a blak magik class" an he winked "were gonna use somtin alidle bit diferant" he went ova to da closet an opned in. an out came... A KLUKKLUCKSKLANMAN!1111 **The KKK group? Oh gosh. **

so we all wnet up an did r patronises. ron did a snak. jenni did a egele. den i cam up an did a big o dragen. "DAZ AMAZING" sed magik jonson. **Gary Sue much? **

den draco cam up an did a cjickin cuz he wuz a chikin. "dat wuz dum" sed magik jonson "u fail".** I really want that on a shirt. "Dat wuz dum, U Fail." ** drako wen bak 2 da bak of da room. **Aww, poor Draco! **

den da police came an arrestd me fo no reson. **Random turn of events!** "wuz goin on" sed makig jonson. "ur under arrest" sed da cops. an dey tok me away an i wen to jail. **Please keep him! **

An: suzpensfl iznt it? nex chapta cummin soon.** I'm going to eat ice cream now. See you tomorrow! **


	6. Chapter 6

**An: Sorry I haven't posted in awhile. But here we go!**

AN: im glad 2 see dat evry1 likd mi stori **( Sure..) **so i desided 2 rit da nex chapta now!111

i wuz in jail. it wuz cold but i had a cot an a toylet an mi romatez nam wuz kiwan. i wuz sad. (**Anyone would be sad if they were in jail.)**

"let mi out!11" i sed.

"no" he sed.

"why did yo put mi in here i didnt do aniting" i sed.

"bcuz ur a nigger an as u no we da police hate niggers" ** This story..is messed up.**

"U CANT US DAT WORD" sed kiwan

"yeh daz r word" i sed.** This is getting harder and harder to read.**

"nigger nigger niger" he sed an began 2 laff.

"well i no a word u mite like" i sed "DRAGEN!111111" den a dragen cam out. ** And killed everyone. The End.**

"!11111111111111111111111" he sed as the ragen began 2 eat him **Is one your favorite number? **

"hes a blak magicon!1" sed anodder gard.

"den i gess well haf 2 tak away his wand!1" sed annoder. an dey did.

"now u cant us magic!1" sed kiwan "but i wish u did... dey dont feed niggas lik us in jail..."

den i had an idea. "du u lik fried chickin" **Microsoft thinks "chickin" is a word. X_X**

"sho i do" he sed "but not all blak ppl lik fried chikin. dat wud be rassist"

"ok" i sed an pointed at da grund an sed "fried chickin" an dere it was.

"hooooray!1111111111111111" sed kiwan. "ur da gratist wiserd iv eva nown!"

den... da fried chickin startd 2 chang... it wuz... VADERMORT!1111111111111 **Who's Vadermort? Darth Vader and Voldy had a baby?**

"die" he sed but kiwan jumpd in da wai an his hed esploded! **Maybe the chicken had a bomb in it. We may never know.**

"beep" sed vadermort ** "Imma do my thing, while you playing with your BEEP. I love that song.**

"turtle! get mi uzi! its i n mi left pokket!1" sed kiwan. an i did. an i shot bullets on vadermort. **The only think I understood was "bullet"**

"IM DIING!" sed vadermort. blod wuz goin evrywere. **Ew.. Someone get a mop!**

"never trust a blak wizard" i sed. an i sed "DRAGEN" an dere wuz more blod evrywere.

"AHHHH IM DIING EVEN MOR!11" sed vadermort. **Shouldn't you already be dead?**

den he fel on da grund ded. **Finally.. **

"U KILLD VADERMORT!111" sed harry potter. **WHOA! Where did you come from?**

"GUD JOB" sed magik jonson. **What the hell?**

den snap cam up an sed "cum 2 mi oriface" ** "Cum 2 mi oriFACE?" Bad thoughts..**

AN: but dunt worri dis is nut da last uv herd of darth vader!111 **Is it me, or is this story getting more stupider? **


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